Your happiness has nothing to do with your positivity!

Wed, 14 Sep 2022 09:23:21 +0000

"Mary lives in a single room, gets food just enough to fill her stomach, has no more than seven dresses to wear, but still so happy and satisfied. And you have all the luxuries and comforts still you are always sad and just complaining." How many times you have heard such things from your parents or about such people? Do you wonder why some people are always happy come what may and a few always sad 'come what may'. Well, some of you will say because these people have a positive attitude towards Life. But why then others do not have such attitude? Some people have to try very hard to think positive, but still they end up being in misery. Foremost, we must know which things give us pleasure. All those things or activities which leads to the evolutionary succes gives happiness in animals, like food and sex. Since the cognitive revolution pleasurable things have gone far more complicated for humans. A good career, house, partner, money, children, car etc also give pleasure to humans. Expand in pleasurable things means you have more choices, having more choices means having more control over pleasurable things. When you can't make things happen which you have more control over, leads to more dissatisfaction and frustration. We can say, that's why people in ancient times were more satisfied and happier than today. And poor more satisfied with their lives than rich. A survey conducted in the British-india revealed that sex workers in Calcutta had the same level of satisfaction or a little more than those studying in university of Calcutta. Happiness Formula. "Happiness Formula" by Lyubumirsky, Sheldon, Schkade, Seligman: H=S+C+V (for more information read "the happiness hypothesis"by Jonathan Haidt). (S)= biological set point (genes). (C)= conditions of your life which you can't change about like your race, sex, caste, gender. They are constant over time, such sort of things are more applicable to adaption theory. (V)= voluntary activities which you choose to do, as what you want to eat in breakfast or whom you want to be your boyfriend. But extreme biological version says that H=S , C and V don't matter. But I think C and V matter. Don't your mood cheer up when you get the time to do your favourite activity (V). Or if a transgender female goes through surgeries and becomes a female, doesn't she feel more confident and happier. But, (c) and (v) can give you short term pleasures not long term happiness. For how long you will be happy that you did your favourite activity in the morning or even if now you are the sex with which you identify yourself with, the latter one will go through adaption principle. When your life is at a plateau, your happiness is determined by your biological set point (genes). If we assume happiness from the range of 1 to 10. Going back to the foremost example, maybe Mary's biological set point of happiness is from 7 to 10. And the other girl's from 3 to 5. Even if Mary would be in her worst emotional condition, her happiness wouldn't go much below to 7 or just 7. And even if the other girl would be at her best emotional condition, her happiness wouldn't much higher than 5 or just 5. If that other girl's ancestor who would also had the same biological set point from the range of 3 to 5, lived in a village would be happier than her. Most probably with highest happines range 5 because countryside people have less choice over pleasurable things. On the other hand the girl would most probably live with her lowest happiness range '3'. As she has more choices to gain pleasurable things and more control. That's why we say people in ancient times were happier than people in Times Today!